Hi Reader, Most people move more when they feel unsure. In fact, nervous speakers speed up, fidget, and fill every gap with words — because silence feels risky. What confident communicators do is the opposite. They pause.They stay grounded.They don’t rush to fill the space.They’re not scrambling for the next thought. That’s self-trust — the willingness to pause without panicking. This is true whether you’re speaking in person or online. Stillness tells people: nothing needs to be proven right...
13 days ago • 1 min read
Hi Reader, Most people add words when they feel unsure. It shows up as one more sentence, extra explanation or clarifying something no one asked for. But in presentations that matter, something different shows up. People who know what’s at stake speak less. They stop sooner and trust the point to land. Not because they have nothing more to say — but because they know what actually matters. Authority isn’t volume. It’s knowing what matters. If you want to see what this sounds like in practice,...
20 days ago • 1 min read
Hi Reader, Last week, Emily S. asked if confident speakers are just naturally polished. My response: "No!- they're disciplined" A lot of work looks effortless from the outside. Confident speakers, polished creators, people who seem calm and clear every time they speak put the work in and ... What we usually don’t see... is the discipline underneath it. Clarity shows up as subtraction and confidence shows up as restraint— fewer words, clear and strategic silence (a.k.a pauses), and solid...
27 days ago • 1 min read
Hi Reader, Most people don’t struggle with speaking because they don’t know what to say. They struggle because they don’t get to practice out loud, in front of real people, and in a space that feels safe. This Monday, I’m opening The Lab — a live, low-pressure space to practice speaking out loud, or observe first, if that is more your vibe. 🗓 Monday, Dec 22⏰ 3:00 pm MST You don’t need a speech.You don’t need to be “ready.” If you (yourself or with a buddy) would like to join us, you can find...
about 2 months ago • 1 min read
Your heart drums beneath your ribs and the spotlight threatens to burn hotter with every second. Then your shaky words betray you and you know that if you don’t pull it together right now — you’re cooked 🔥(as gen Z would say). That’s stage fright doing what stage fright does best — hijacking your body like the confidence gremlin it is. The internet keeps telling you to “just breathe” or “picture the audience naked.” Let’s be real — that doesn’t help when you’re in front of people whose...
3 months ago • 1 min read
You don’t need to be charismatic to be compelling. But you do need to be authentic. And that is scary. One of my clients told me, “Val, I’ll never be a great speaker. I’m too quiet. I don’t have that ‘command the room’ energy.” She was calm, deliberate, thoughtful — everything she thought worked against her.But once she stopped trying to “perform” and started showing up authentically, everything changed.And suddenly, people leaned in. That’s the thing about authenticity — it’s magnetic. It’s...
3 months ago • 2 min read
Here’s the truth no one likes to admit: You can watch speaking tips videos from Simon Sinek and Vinh Giang and every other public speaking guru on social media. You can ask ChatGPT to help you prepare for your next presentation. You can attend years of Toastmasters meetings. And when you stand up to speak you STILL feel your throat close, your heart race, your breath shorten. You still sweat and your legs still shake. And that’s okay. You’re not broken; you’re human. When you speak under...
3 months ago • 1 min read
Hi Reader, There’s something about September that feels like a second New Year for me. The air sharpens. The calendar fills. And suddenly, I'm reminded: there's 4 months left until Santa comes down the chimney and we're ringing in a new year. What do you actually want to do so that when you look back three months from now, you can say "I DID this for myself!"? Too often, we let the seasons sweep us along—family, kids, projects, meetings— the "busy" and before we know it, we've done everything...
4 months ago • 1 min read
Hi Reader, Last month, a client sent me her AI draft. On paper, it was flawless and the grammar was perfect. It had a clean flow, and if you've ever used a GPT to write your draft, you'd have noticed it wrote in short, punchy sentences. When she read it aloud… she sounded like a robot. You could 'tell' it wasn't written by a human. Here’s why: it was stripped of emotion and because she was clinging to perfection—every word had to be flawless, and every sentence had to be “just right,” she...
5 months ago • 1 min read
Don't know about you, Reader... … but I love a good quiz 🤗 Whether it’s, “What does your Starbucks order say about you?” or, “Which Taylor Swift song suits your personality?,” we all LOVE to learn about ourselves! But the questions that really matter when it comes to turning your dream public speaking presence into a reality have little to do with piccolo lattes and pop stars. They have to do with how you prioritize, practice, and make real progress on your public speaking skills. And, after...
8 months ago • 1 min read